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Self-diagnosis - Funny in the Head

There are times when Hollywood resembles nothing more closely than a sheltered workshop for anxiety-wracked individuals wrestling with mental health issues. Desperate hopefuls, burned out wannabes, wipe down marble tops in sleek martini bars and valet park Ferraris on the boulevard. When home at last, worn smooth as old shoes, they spoon baked beans out from a can and wonder; how long can I do this before I go quite mad? Ironically, there are very few movies showcasing the profound, emotional struggle faced by those valiant souls who battle, and ultimately vanquish, mental illness. However, that didn’t prevent me from tracking down some of the very best ones. Now comes the fun part. How many of them can you identify from the signature dialogue snippets listed below? [Note: There is an answer key at the bottom of the page.]
There are times when letting others know how you really feel is inappropriate, even self-defeating. For this reason, it is important to realize when one is inadvertently revealing too much about one's inner life. This brief video blog provides a useful tutorial in the fine art of not being yourself, convincingly.
Sooner or later we are all tormented by that nagging, unnerving question. You know the one. Am I wearing my underwear over my clothes? Is my cheese slipping off the cracker? Am I marching to the beat of a different didgeridoo? Is the diploma in my den from Whassamatta U? Like a pebble wedged firmly in your shoe the uncertainty refuses to leave, taunting and mocking until thinking of anything else is impossible. I’ve been troubled by these moments of existential meltdown for decades, which is why I was so excited when my friends at Kronko told me about self-diagnosis with SynAPPS® - the latest in “smart” applications for iPhones, iPads, and ay caramba. Here’s how it works. As an intelligent application, SynAPPS® records your online activities in order to build, and regularly update, a psychodynamic knowledge base enabling it to gauge your sanity quotient on demand.