Parenting Lessons: Tough Parents Persevere

January 21, 2014 Heiddi Zalamar, LMHC, MA

Yesterday, I celebrated Martin Luther King, Jr. day by spending it with Bob. As I thought of what to write about this week, I thought of Mr. King and his dream. It was his dream to see people of all backgrounds together in harmony. This was a big dream. Almost impossible even. How could one man do such a thing? Martin Luther King, Jr. did so with perseverance.

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Tough People Persevere

Martin Luther King, Jr. was a tough person. He held on to his dream when others would probably have walked away. There was danger, threats and fear all around him, yet he still held on. He even convinced others of his dream. It is because of his perseverance that many changes have come to pass. While there is still work to be done, we've gotten a pretty good start because of Martin Luther King, Jr.

Tough Parents Persevere

No one ever said that parenting was easy. In fact, it is very hard to parent. Much more so if you add a mental illness into the equation. Some of the toughest moments of parenting Bob was when I was so close to quitting. I was so frustrated by Bob's ADHD that I couldn't stand myself as a mother. I didn't like the mother I was pre-diagnosis. I was more punitive and less compassionate.

Finally, I got to the point where I couldn't take it anymore and asked for back-up. I talked to a friend. Her son was older and had ADHD plus diabetes. She was a tough parent. My friend described how her family was against everything she did to help her son with his ADHD. She told me that she was going to do the best for her son regardless of what her family thought about it. Because she was a tough parent. She had perseverance.

I had to Persevere

Because of my friend's example and the suffering Bob was going through, I was able to push through this to ask for even more help. I continued and persevered despite challenges of my family and Bob's father disagreeing with me. I persevered because Bob needed me to. He needed me to help him live with his mental illness rather than put up with it. And I'm grateful that I persevered. Bob is a healthy, happy almost 13-year-old already thinking about high school. He loves science, games and is a sweetheart. Yes, Bob still has things to learn, but he is an amazing kid. He's come a long way from the pre-diagnosis days. And I'm so proud. Today, I celebrate Martin Luther King, Jr. by being a tough person. How will you celebrate him?

photo credit: symphony of love via photopin cc

APA Reference
Zalamar, H. (2014, January 21). Parenting Lessons: Tough Parents Persevere, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2024, February 28 from

Author: Heiddi Zalamar, LMHC, MA

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