Moving Beyond Self-Harm and Accepting Change
We all have days where we feel a rush of emotions. When we feel frustrated, depressed or angry, we tend to take out our frustration on ourselves or on those we love. We don’t mean to become defensive or hurtful, it just happens without thought. For those who struggle with mental illness, holding back these behaviors can take time and practice and is definitely not easy. It isn’t easy to stop the urge to self-harm when triggers are coming at you from every angle.
Sometimes, the negative people around you are those triggers.
When these days and feelings arise, it’s important to take in your surroundings and listen to others. Don’t just hear the noise around you, listen and absorb what people are saying. You may unexpectedly find phrases and information that can take you out of your rut and towards more positive thoughts and emotions.
Many people who self-harm, struggle with other mental illnesses - depression, bipolar disorder or eating disorders. Sadly, self-harm can be linked to many other difficulties such as abuse, violence and, in my case, dealing with divorce. These might be some reasons as to why it is so difficult to stop self-harming when the urge is present – just like any addiction. However, by taking in your surroundings and appreciating the positive people around you, you may be able to forget about your self-harm urges and focus on the positive messages hiding in your environment.
Moving Forward Beyond Self-Harm and Accepting Change
I was sitting at my desk at work when I overheard my coworker say something I found to be inspiring. This co-worker is a person who always seems to come across in such a positive, yet humble, manner. Every single time someone asks him how he is, he responds with, “Outstanding. Simply outstanding.” When he was on the phone, I heard him make this statement: “If you aren’t changing, you aren’t moving forward.”
When the words were said, I realized how truthful it was. If you aren’t changing the behaviors you want to change, you aren’t moving forward in a positive direction. For those who self-harm, it’s hard sometimes to accept that fact that you need to stop the actions you’ve become so accustomed to.
It took me many months to finally get the help I needed to work towards changing my self-injurious behaviors. Once I accepted the fact I needed to stop, I began moving forward towards a self-harm-free life. It wasn’t an easy road and everyone who has overcome any addiction knows that to be more than true. However, it is absolutely possible to stop hurting yourself, but it’s important to realize that every day will be a battle.
Listen to those around you because their words could be the push you need to move forward and conquer those self-harm urges and self-harm for good. Even if judgmental people surround you or someone doesn’t seem to be your biggest fan, find the people who actually bring forth a positive energy. It isn’t healthy to focus your own energy on the negative people in your life.
Once you discover those around you who have a kind heart, your heart will open up to the idea of change.
You can also find Jennifer Aline Graham on Google+, Facebook, Twitter and her website is here. Find out more about Noon through Amazon.com.
APA Reference
Aline, J.
(2014, October 3). Moving Beyond Self-Harm and Accepting Change, HealthyPlace. Retrieved
on 2024, December 23 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/speakingoutaboutselfinjury/2014/10/moving-beyond-self-harm-and-accepting-change