PTSD and the Exaggerated Startle Response
When I explain my posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) startle response to people who don't have much knowledge about the disorder, I like to describe my brain as being "stuck in survival mode." It's the easiest way to describe how I feel to people who don't have PTSD because everyone understands what "survival mode" means.
Sure, not many people I meet have experienced the same type of trauma that I have experienced. But everybody understands the fight-or-flight response. It, and the startle response from PTSD or not, is a shared human experience.
Understanding the PTSD Exaggerated Startle Response
My favorite example to use when relating my experiences to those without PTSD is the feeling of skipping a step going down the stairs. We've all been there: that moment when your foot reaches for the ground and finds only air, when fear runs up your spine and time seems to slow for a second. It's an uncomfortable feeling, and it can take your body a couple of seconds to calm down after your foot finds solid ground.
That's a feeling I experience every day. My mind has trouble distinguishing between real and false dangers, so it treats them all the same. My triggers can be as little as a shampoo bottle falling in the shower or as big as a car slamming on its breaks in front of me. It doesn't matter. My brain responds the same way, screaming, "Watch out!" as loudly as it can.
My startle response is one of the most embarrassing symptoms of PTSD I experience. Unlike the rest of my PTSD symptoms, I can't just put on a happy face and pretend everything is okay when it happens. It's difficult for me to control my physical responses when I'm in public. I flinch when strangers brush up against me in the grocery store. I jump out of my chair when someone sneaks up to my desk at work. I gasp when someone turns a corner on the street at the same time as me. If I didn't expect it to happen, I'm almost guaranteed to be startled.
How to Deal with a PTSD Startle Response
I react this way as an adult because of the violence I experienced in my household growing up. As a kid, I never knew when the next bad thing was going to happen. The only way to stay safe was to be ready to act at a moment's notice. Though my environment today is no longer dangerous, my body doesn't know how to calm down. It continues to read incoming sounds and touches as threats and forces me to react accordingly.
I'm still learning how to reduce my PTSD startle response, and I don't have the perfect solution for anyone struggling with similar issues. What I have learned, however, is that it takes time. Little by little, I've begun to relax around friends and family members I know I can trust. In places I feel safe, such as the library or my gym, I've made active efforts to quiet the constant warnings of danger in my mind.
Trusting your surroundings after experiencing trauma can be scary. The grocery store can feel dangerous. A simple touch on your shoulder can feel like an attack. The exaggerated startle response is a normal trauma reaction and it's something people with PTSD can work through over time. With my own startle response, I'm learning to relax where and when it matters the most, and I'm proud of my body for taking these first steps towards peace.
Avery, B. (2019, June 24). PTSD and the Exaggerated Startle Response, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2019, August 18 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/traumaptsdblog/2019/6/ptsd-and-the-exaggerated-startle-response