Today Linda and I celebrated our first year anniversary!
As part of our anniversary weekend together, we took a drive down to the beach where we were married and looked through our wedding vows, giving ourselves a kind-of report card on our first year together. The past year had its rough spots, its ups and downs, it doubts and fears, and its co-dependencies. But we have hit the one year mark and that is an achievement that stands on its own.
I've finally learned that, yes, relationships really can be full of fun and excitement. But I've also learned that a "meaningful" relationship with Linda requires putting my whole self into the effort of creating and sustaining the meaning and love that relationship offers to us. Good, healthy relationships simply don't happen by accident. Nor are they merely the by-product of attraction.
I must credit Linda for her deep level of commitment. Many times I wanted to quit or regress to the safety of my past. But she kept loving me unconditionally through it all. She kept offering me acceptance and forgiveness.
Taking a Step Four inventory of myself, this marriage has helped me see that I still have many, many miles to go on the recovery road. But that's OK. What makes recovery exciting is the fact that this journey never ends. Every day offers new insights and new puzzles and new glances in the mirror. Every day offers new opportunities to grow and mature. Every day is the beginning.
My job is to stay mindful and respectful and keep learning from the experience. And this holds true not only for my marriage, but for all the relationships in my daily round.
Maybe that is the essence of recovery - learning to live in mindful respect every single minute of the day, seizing every opportunity to show kindness and good will to each person I encounter. At least, that is the goal I am striving to attain through recovery.
Dear God, thank You for my wonderful marriage and the many lessons You are teaching me through my beautiful wife. Amen.
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Staff, H. (2008, December 14). Anniversary Celebration, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2022, June 25 from https://www.healthyplace.com/relationships/serendipity/anniversary-celebration