Self-Care. I've been sharing my perspective on self-care for parents with a child diagnosed with mental illness for a few months now. So many of the parents I work with don't practice good self-care. It is probably the last thing you think about at the end of a long, hectic day. You have bills to pay, a home to clean and a family to care for. So where do you fit in? When do you get your self-care?

Reflection I try to do this often. Reflection is important because it allows me to step back and see what's really there. Taking time to think about To think about what Bob has been through the last year or even the last few years. Bob is a trooper, but then I have been, too. I came across this quote by Garrison Kriellor who wrote: "Nothing you do for children is ever wasted. They seem not to notice us, hovering, averting our eyes, and they seldom offer thanks, but what we do for them is never wasted."

Decision making Making decisions is always on the mind of a parent with a child who has mental illness. What school will they go to? Will it meet their needs? What medications can we try? Which ones will work? Which ones don't? What does the therapist, teacher, psychiatrist, pediatrician say? Everyday, we as parents (in general) make decisions in the best interest of our children. But, when does that transition from us to our children? When do they start making decisions about their own lives?

Is your child's psychiatric medication not working anymore? I know the feeling. For the last four months, I've noticed changes in Bob's behavior. Not for the better either. At first, I thought that his 12th birthday (and the onset of hormones) may have triggered the behavior changes. But, I realized that it was his ADHD medication and it was possibly time for a change.

Ever thought to yourself, "I'm so stressed out that I can't see straight?" Yup, that's where I am right now and have been for the past few months. I am stressed out due to a combination of things - work, Bob, Bob's schoolwork, summer plans, writing, bills, etc. I'm sure there are a few more to add, but I'm so fried I can't list all of them here. I want to do the best job that I can with everything I do. But, my tendency to overachieve gets me stressed out.

Parenting a child with mental illness brings along many challenges. In my work, I've found parents who have a difficult time with children who just WON'T listen. You talk to them until your voice is hoarse and your kids continue to not do what you want them to do.

Life with Bob and His father has not been easy. I've been writing about parenting a child with mental illness (ADHD in Bob's case).  I've not written much about my relationship with Bob's father. It is a difficult and challenging one. Almost, if not more challenging than my relationship with Bob.

May 9th, 2013 has been declared Children's Mental Health Awareness Day by the Substance Abuse & Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA). "The effort seeks to raise awareness about the importance of children's mental health and that positive mental health is essential to a child's healthy development from birth."

Last week, I shared how Aunt Flo affects my parenting of Bob. After having a challenging month, it hit me hard when I realized how much Bob was impacted by it. So, I've come up with some tips (that I use at work, but need to practice with Bob) that will help you when Aunt Flo visits or when you're just stressed out.

As a professional in mental health counseling with a strong background in Behavior Modification, I can tell when my patterns change. In the infamous words of SpongeBob SquarePants, I'm a crabby patty. For two weeks a month, premenstrual syndrome and menstruation (aka Aunt Flo) affect me and in turn, Bob.