Self-Harm Scars Can Trick People Who Don't Understand
Self-harm scars can terrify people who don't understand self-injury. Self-harm scars can cause a million thoughts to run through their brains. Judgments and assumptions are some of those thoughts, and for some who aren’t knowledgeable on self-injury, they may see self-harm scars and instantly believe that the person suffers currently. But that is not always the case.
When People Notice Self-Harm Scars
Even the most noticeable scars can be from many years passed and when they are noticed, people may think they were created recently. Some people may think this person needs immediate help and grow uneasy around them, whispering to others and beginning untrue discussions. People judge and spread rumors without even realizing it and, sadly, self-harm can be triggered by those actions.
Scars are very mysterious and often people want to know what caused them. People may see a scar and, before thinking, ask someone how it happened. If this person struggles with self-harm, they may freeze and spit out a lie. I know that when I used to cut myself, I’d spit out some pretty creative lies for reasons behind fresh marks. Like stated before, many of my scars have gone away. But for those that remain, I always wonder if people recognize that they’re there.
And if they do notice them, do they think I’m still struggling to overcome self-harm?
People With Self-Harm Scars May Not Currently Harm Themselves
Recently, I was in line at a rest stop and noticed a very thin girl ahead of me. When she scratched her arm, I noticed white scars lining her arms to her elbows. She was wearing some bracelets, like how I always need to, and I couldn’t stop staring. For self-harmers, past and present, scars instantly bring you back to an unsafe place. You may feel insecure for a moment and adjust your bracelets or cross your arms. Some may want to say something to her, asking her if she’s okay or expressing how they too struggled with self-harm.
However, that is a very risky thing to do. If it has been years since he or she last hurt him or herself, bringing up the topic (especially with a stranger) can be a dangerous thing. In general, bringing up the topic of self-injury can be tough for anyone who has been involved with self-harm in the past or present.
The safest thing to do, if you recognize scars, is show you care and wait until the person discusses it with you. Maybe it has been years since they last hurt themselves but they still can’t talk about it. Maybe they currently are self-harming and still haven’t come to terms with how unsafe it is.
The most you can do is not judge the scars you see, as hard as it is to do. Once you see past the marks, you will see the person – that’s what counts.
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APA Reference
Aline, J.
(2014, July 27). Self-Harm Scars Can Trick People Who Don't Understand, HealthyPlace. Retrieved
on 2024, November 5 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/speakingoutaboutselfinjury/2014/07/the-trickery-of-self-harm-scars
Author: Jennifer Aline Graham
I enjoyed reading your post. I have to say people who have never experienced self-harm rarely have couth. I don't know how many times I will be in the middle of talking to someone and they interrupt me saying "wow, what did you do get caught in barbwire!?" I'm not ashamed of my scars. They are over 7 years old, but still quite obvious. For me, it's the past, it's done. However, interrupting me mid-sentence to ask about my scars is downright rude. Hopefully, those who do not or have not self-harm(ed) will read your blog and learn to be a little more courteous.