Whether you haven’t self-harmed in years or are currently in the battle, flashbacks of weak moments always pop up. It's inevitable that you're going to see a scar and remember the reason it was put there.  These moments can come from a song, a place or even a person. Such as an ex-boyfriend or girlfriend.

It’s the sad truth, but celebrities have taken over the world. For some reason, we find it interesting that Kim Kardashian named her daughter North West and we continue to watch re-runs of Jersey Shore even though we know it’s killing our brain cells. Celebrities take us away from the realities we live in and, sometimes, it is a positive way to escape. However, what happens when the paparazzi puts up photos of a celebrity with cuts on his or her arms (self-harm scars)? How do the fans react to the self-harm of celebrities?

It is terrifying to talk about your self-harm if you are having difficulty coming to terms with it yourself. It is even scarier to talk to loved ones about your self-harm issues because it can be just as scary for them too. Not many people understand why self-injurers do what they do and where the need to cut or burn drives from. Sometimes, even the self-harmer doesn't know why or how they started to do what they do. Distraction? Accident? Boredom? No matter what the trigger was and how it started, self-injury becomes an addiction and it can be terrifying to try to make others understand it.

There are not always obvious signs of self-harm. Many people are quiet about it – which is understandable since it is a personal addiction. Because there is not a “Self-Harmers Table” in the cafeteria or a “Self-Harmers Staff Room” at work, it tends to be tough to recognize who is doing what. However, sometimes it is too obvious to ignore. When I used to cut, I hid my marks behind leather bracelets and watches. I’d put foundation on my scars and fresh wounds and made sure I had some with me at all times. I did everything in my power to make it so I looked like the typical, happy teenager. Inside, I was screaming.

As a self-harmer, you’re going to have scars. You’re going to have cuts or burns or scrapes or bruises that stick around for the rest of your life. Sometimes, these marks can be hidden and forgotten about. However, some marks are not that easy to push aside and can haunt you. I wasn’t a self-harmer who needed to dig real deep when cutting. I was calm after some small marks and a little pain because, that in itself, redirected me. (read: Self-Injury Cutting: Cutting Yourself to Relieve Emotional Pain) However, I do have self-harm scars that have lingered over the years that I do not think are going to go away. Some of you may be the self-injurers who have a hard time hiding your marks with some foundation and bracelets. Some of you may feel embarrassed to wear short sleeves or a bathing suit because it is visible that you’re painted in pain. For recovered self-harmers and those still struggling, we are “living with ladders.”

Everyday is a struggle – all those dealing with anxiety's racing thoughts and self-harm understand that. But anxiety is an issue that every human being puts up with, whether or not they want to admit it. For those who cut, pull hair, burn or head-bang, anxiety is usually what controls the self-harming behaviors (When Anxiety Leads to Self-Injury).

“All Self-Harmers are Suicidal and Seek Attention” That statement is, sadly, the ultimate stigma of self-harm. The media has played a small part with this stigma, portraying self-injurers as being the ones who sit quietly in the corner, cutting their arms and crying. (read: Self-Injurers and Their Common Personality Traits) Wrong. Sadly, this is how many people see self-harmers when, in reality, many self-harmers do not fit into a particular clique. In high school, I was a typical music geek. I was a serious ballet dancer, performed in musicals, and did Colorguard in the marching band. I laughed along with friends and pushed out a smile when teachers walked by. However, leather bracelets covered the self-harm scars I was trying to hide and bathrooms were where I hid when I couldn’t stop the thoughts in my head from yelling at me – telling me to hurt myself. I did not feel as talented as those around me and put on a charade day after day. I was not cutting myself to kill myself every time I made a mark. I was cutting for reasons that those around me couldn’t understand.

Finding healthy alternatives to self-injury can be stressful. Sometimes, it’s tough finding someone who understands the emotions and thoughts connected with self-harm. Many people hate thinking about counseling or talking about their self-harm because, well, it is too personal. So, if you’re too nervous to jump into therapy or tell someone you self-injure, where can you go? What can you do? Why not dive into a good book? A TV show? A movie?

Biting nails. Popping zits. Picking blisters. Scratching scabs. Who can honestly say they have not done any of the above? If you said you haven’t, I do not believe you. We are all human and we all have little habits we do, sometimes without even realizing it. Some people will spend fifteen minutes in the mirror just picking at the pimples or zits or blackheads on their face. Before a big test, people tend to bite their nails and hangnails, sometimes until they bleed. Surprise, surprise – these are self-harming behaviors.

I am a childhood cancer survivor and have an obsession with vintage typewriters. I have a Mini Schnauzer named Sir Theodore Rufus and still walk like a chicken from dancing ballet for seventeen years. I have a Bachelor's Degree in Child and Family Studies and collect crazy-looking journals everywhere I go. I have a liking for tattoos and sometimes wish I was a Broadway star. Did I mention I was a cutter?