Frustrated with ADHD
Having ADHD can be frustrating. Merely struggling with compensating for the challenges so they don’t interfere with daily functioning and learning new ways to do things can be taxing. There is a constant internal battle of symptom and strategy waging inside yourself when you are coping with ADHD. In fact, a lot about ADHD is exhausting, however, putting up with or hearing from people who misunderstand or have misconceptions about ADHD has to top the list.
Recently I was on a social chat forum online when the question was asked:
What is the most frustrating misconception about ADHD that you have heard?
Definitely for me, the top most frustrating comment I hear is when people say “I don’t believe in ADHD”. It takes almost everything I have not to reach out and try to shake some sense into people who say this. I just want to start quoting the studies and statistics that support the reality of ADHD. Or simply let out a big dramatic sigh, remind them that not believing in something doesn’t make it not exist and walk away. To be honest, when I hear this statement, it takes everything in me not to do all these things.
ADHD is Very Real
But I have learned to channel my desire to shake or lecture or badger the facts into people who don’t understand what ADHD is…how it is real and different for everyone diagnosed with it. And how it can truly interfere with life…but also enhance it. Instead, at least most of the time, I try to remain curious and ask questions to understand where this belief comes from. Because it’s possible they have never realized they know someone with ADHD or truly aren’t aware of all the aspects of ADHD. And the moment is a great opportunity to increase awareness of ADHD…my all time passion!
Other Misconceptions About ADHD
Here are some other exasperating erroneous beliefs you have probably heard at least once in your ADHD life that have tested your patience:
“Everyone is a little AD/HD.”
“That kid just needs some strong discipline.”
“You should never give ADHD medications to kids. They will just end up all drugged up or will abuse it.”
“You can’t have ADHD, you’re an adult.”
“No, she can’t have ADHD, she’s a girl.”
“Your child has ADHD? Oh that must be so frustrating.”
“It seems like the whole world has been diagnosed with ADHD.”
“How do you have ADHD? You’re not bouncing off the walls.”
“He doesn’t have ADHD; he can sit and focus in front of that video game all day.”
What is the most frustrating misconception YOU have heard about ADHD?
Laurie Dupar, Senior Certified ADHD Coach and trained Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner, specializes in working with clients who have been diagnosed with ADD/ADHD and want to finally understand how their brain works, minimize their challenges and get things done! Through individual/group coaching, live speaking, and her writing, she helps clients and their loved ones use effective strategies to minimize their ADHD challenges so they can experience success. She is the co-author and editor of 365 ways to succeed with ADHD and author of Brain surfing and 31 other Awesome Qualities of ADHD. For more information, please visit http://www.coachingforadhd.com.
Dupar, L. (2013, June 4). Frustrated with ADHD, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2022, December 5 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/livingwithadultadhd/2013/06/frustrated-with-adhd
Author: Laurie Dupar, PMHNP, RN, PCC
Sometimes we overestimate others in revealing our ADD. My latest decision is to talk to only my ADD coach and group about it. I came to this decision after being in a peer counseling group for a Mental Health center. There I met a woman who had been a SPED teacher for years, and had very liberal ideas. We made friends, and I told her of my ADD but not much later, she withdrew from me abruptly. Others told me later that she doesn't believe in adult ADD and thought I was posturing. Also, I have never had good luck talking to anyone else about it, family, friends. They seem to think I'm jumping on the bandwagon, because so many are being diagnosed ADD. And I have to remember how long it took me to understand my own symptoms, years of reading, etc. And I still am working on it. I guess I can't expect too much of others because it really is complicated. We're not all little boys bouncing off the walls. Maybe sometime in the future, the public will be more educated in this disorder. I'd like to be around to see it.
Thanks for writing!
It is hard sometimes to disclose the ADHD diagnosis, because it's very true that not everyone agrees in its being "real." We can wait for the public to come around, but we must also be secure in our diagnosis and self-understanding. Know who you are and try not to let others' understanding of ADHD hurt too much.