Recovery From Eating Disorders Comes From Within

Recovery from eating disorders comes from within.. Super :)

Fran P.,
I do appreciate your comments, but I feel I must clear up some misconceptions. By writing about eating disorders, I feel that I am actually taking away the power from them because eating disorders thrive in secrecy. Think about it - people with eating disorders often hide their illnesses from other people, and it is not a subject talked about freely in our society. I will use cancer as a comparison. I am 45 and I remember a time when people didn't even speak the word "cancer" out loud. If someone talked about someone having cancer, they usually whispered it. Now people talk about cancer, and they hold support groups and there is research into the causes of cancer and cancer has become something not to be ashamed of.
By writing about eating disorders in a positive way, I feel I am doing the same thing - opening the door so people don't have to feel ashamed that they have an eating disorder, but instead can talk about it, write about it, and get the treatment they need. This is really true for all mental illnesses - the doors must be open and the truth must be spoken; the shame needs to be lifted.
I appreciate your concern about my life, but trust me, I have an incredibly active life. I am a graduate student, have many friends and family nearby whom I see regularly, I love to read, watch movies, hang out with people, and I am a freelance writer. I love using my writing skills in this forum to help others, but it is not the only type of writing I do. And yes, I do have my own personal blog in which I write about my recovery - I could no more not write than I could stop breathing. It's who I am. Btw, I do not have a son. I was not able to have children.
One final point - if I were trying for the "best anorexic" right now, I definitely would lose since I am on a strict meal plan with three meals and three supplements a day and am slowly but surely gaining weight. I plan to make 2011 the year I am done with anorexia, and I hope that for you and for all who are struggling with eating disorders.
Remember - the real power comes with opening the conversation and not allowing eating disorders to lurk and hide. Thank you for your thoughts, and I think you have given me a great idea for a blog post. I wish you the best in your recovery.

angela,
as a recovering anorexic, when i watch your video i am having theses thoughts: blogging about the ED continues to give it a lot of power. the amount of time and energy you are spending writing and responding to blogs feeds your addiction. you have a captive audience and continue to be "the best anorexic" for all of the world-wide web. i would guess you are on other blogs and websites also.
there is always a split second before eating that we could decide to choose the food, instead of refusing the food. i believe you know what i am saying here. we anorexics don't like to admit this. but it is the exact moment that we are giving our power away.
my new year's resolution is working on improving relationships with the people i've hurt, spending more time with healthy people, and less time with my computer.
angela, go live an active life, move, laugh with your son, celebrate with your girlfriends, and take the power away from food! you have been given all the tools you need during your hospitalizations. get going and make 2011 your year of living!

Daniel,
Thank you for your kind comments. I know it might seem that I am giving power to my eating disorder (technically, eating disorders are in a separate category than substance abuse, i.e. addiction, under the DSM-IV R diagnostic criteria; although there is no doubt in my mind that anorexia and other eating disorders are addictive and have addictive qualities); however, I assure you I am not. When I refer to "Ed" or something like that, I am using a therapeutic technique utilized by many eating disorder specialists to separate the eating disorder from yourself. Actually, this might make a great future topic for one of my posts - thanks for generating such good discussion!

Hello Angela, thank you for your 'from the heart' video share. I appreciate your courage even though it sounds like you are still in the middle of coming to terms with your addiction. It's easy to speak out when everything is great but another thing to admit when they are not.
When I read the title of this video, "Recovery from Eating Disorders Comes from Within", I was compelled to watch. Even though I work in addiction treatment, it is mostly with drugs and alcohol and it is with men. Regardless, I think what I am about to say still applies.
The way you describe your addiction it sounds like it is a person rather than a disorder. By 'humanizing' your addiction I feel you are giving it more power than it deserves. The power is in you! Now I don't want to get into semantics over the meaning of power such as the concept of 'powerlessness' used by many 12-step groups. But I'm talking about acknowledging your own power, which includes the power to reach out and seek help from others.
So, thank you for your video and remember, like you say, that recovery from eating disorders comes from within!

I am very proud of you. Keep up the good work. Love ya!