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Anxiety – Tough Times

Some with depression and anxiety drop out of college (How Can Colleges Help Students with Mental Illness?). I graduated from high school at 17 and was ready to tear through my freshman year of college. Instead, I dropped out of college with depression and anxiety. What followed were eight years of insecurity and an intense dread for the future.
A panic attack is an intense physical and emotional reaction, often to non-threatening stimuli. Panic attacks are common in those with anxiety. There are many panic attack triggers, but they are not always consistent. I've had panic attacks both at home and at the grocery store. Understanding triggers for panic attacks makes them less scary.
I’m Ashley Horsfall and I am excited to be writing Getting Through Tough Times. I have been dealing with depression and anxiety since before I was even a teenager, and I’m now in my mid-20s. My conditions were not diagnosed until just three years ago, and today I still struggle. My journey with mental illness has not been easy, and it certainly hasn’t been consistent; however, I am passionate about helping people like me learn how to cope with depression and anxiety of their own.
This quote has made me consider if mental illness really is the barrier to success we imagine it to be: Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts. Throughout my life I have found myself in positions that I thought would break me entirely. I have sat in my room with no door, surrounded by debts, destruction and bowls of my own vomit. I have laid in a hospital bed, covered in tubes and wires – desperate and alone. And I have crouched on the floor of mental institutions, rocking and trapped, painting bloody smears on the walls from the masochism of my own fingernails. But has all this mental illness been a barrier to success?
I grew up in a household that threw around words like "accountability" and "free agency" right along with "dinner time" and "brush your teeth". I was constantly told that I had the right to make my own decisions and my own mistakes. Because that was what God wanted; that was why I was alive -- to make my own choices, be my own person and to ultimately end up dwelling in eternal, celestial bliss. Because that was the fine-print, the unspoken stipulations: they were the loop-holes. I could make my own elections – provided they were correct. I could be my own person -- on the condition that I was the right one. And I could live however I wanted, as long as I followed all of the rules and abandoned my individual self-confidence.