Cancelling plans can be easy to do when your confidence is low. You may be anxious or uncomfortable, and those feelings will probably intensify as the plans draw nearer (take the Social Anxiety Disorder Test: Do I Have Social Anxiety?). Fear and anxiety can be overwhelming and negative thoughts take over. Negative feelings can get so uncomfortable, and pulling out of your plans may seem like the easiest thing to do. However, cancelling plans or not showing up can make things worse. It’s important to stop cancelling plans because of low confidence.

Practicing self-compassion can help you increase self-esteem, become more confident and less critical with yourself. Self-compassion is a positive self-view that involves relating to oneself with kindness and acceptance in times of difficulty, rather than criticizing, you look at your situation with compassion. Learn how to increase your self-esteem by practicing self-compassion.

It can be challenging to start socialising when you have low self-esteem. Feelings of self-doubt, not being good enough, fear of being rejected, judged, or embarrassed, or believing you don’t belong can all get in the way. Perhaps you don't know where to begin and it may seem easier to isolate yourself. Additionally, if you don’t have real friends, it can feel intimidating to get out there on your own. However, it’s important that you do socialise even when you have low self-esteem. You need to start socialising in order to meet people, make friends and build your self-esteem.

It’s important to stop using avoidance to deal with self-esteem issues. While it may sometimes seem easier, avoidance is not a healthy way of coping, and it can cause more problems later on. Issues will still be present and they’ll probably become magnified over time. Avoidance can keep you stuck and it can worsen your self-esteem. Stop using avoidance to deal with your self-esteem issues and find a better way.

Stop being too hard on yourself because being too hard on yourself goes hand-in-hand with a low self-esteem. Signs of being too hard on yourself include excessive self-blame, self-criticism, negative self-judgement, self-punishment, and dwelling on your mistakes or flaws. Additionally, you may overlook or discount your positives. It is detrimental to your wellbeing and it’s important to stop it. Stop being too hard on yourself and build your self-esteem. 

Expecting too much from yourself is damaging to your self-esteem and overall wellbeing. It's good to have high standards, but it's important to be reasonable with yourself. Expecting too much from yourself can be associated with disappointment, burnout, anxiety, and depression, as well as low self-esteem. It's therefore in your best interest to stop expecting too much from yourself.

Faking confidence when you’re not confident helps to build self-esteem. There’s a lot of truth to the saying "fake it ’til you make it." Faking confidence does not mean being a phoney, being overly confident or being arrogant. However, it does mean learning to be confident in a healthy way. By faking confidence you can learn how to become more confident and also build self-esteem. 

It's important to keep calm when others put you down and that means staying level headed and reacting in a healthy way. Being put down by others can trigger self-esteem issues and cause emotional distress, if you allow it. The reality is that there will be people who put you down. Most people experience put downs at some point; and these can come from anyone including family members, peers, bullies or even strangers. The good news is that you can learn to keep calm and cope better when others put you down.

It’s easy to believe you don’t fit in, when you have low self-esteem. Perhaps you feel different to everyone else and think you have to be exactly like others to fit in. You might overemphasise your weaknesses, compare yourself to others or expect too much from yourself. Perhaps you were rejected, criticised or bullied in the past or you may feel pressured to be like others. Alternatively, there may be something different that makes you stand out, or you're new and have trouble settling in. The chances are that your thoughts about yourself are negative. No matter what, it’s important to realise that you do belong, just like everyone else. You can improve your self-esteem when you stop believing you don’t fit in.

It can be hard to get through a crisis with your self-esteem intact. Whether it be a major meltdown or a mini crisis,  learning how to get through a crisis can improve your self-esteem.