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I wasn't coping with my thoughts of giving up on school very well the year before I was due to graduate. I was ready to quit school. I would sit in my therapist's office and cry at the thought of going back to campus that following Monday, and it negatively affected my mental health. I would freak out and cry at the drop of a hat, I would freeze up in class and become so jittery that I could barely sit in class.
Any sexual assault event leads naturally to a question: how can one get back one's sense of personal safety, after such a catastrophe? Michele’s July 24 blog post - PTSD and Self-Efficacy: Being Able to Protect Yourself - launches into this question, and it got a distinct reaction from me. I urgently wanted to add something to what she had to say - a male perspective on the problem of personal safety and how to achieve it.
What a happy sounding title for this blog post - not! It's important, though, to know that Adult ADHD does not live in a vacuum all the time and that other goodies (aka co-morbid disorders) can hop on the band wagon of your mental health. For me, it's co-morbid depression.
There are many depression-management techniques available; antidepressant medication, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), exercise and a proper diet, relaxation and general wellness treatments (eg. massage therapy, hypnosis, meditation, aromatherapy, etc.), and so on. Among these therapy techniques is group therapy. But... group therapy for depression? Is it a help or a hindrance?
If there is one thing I can count on in my life it's October. Yes, it's obvious that October arrives each year, but when you live with a mental illness, months can represent moods. And that can be scary. That said, I want to focus this post on a conversation I had with a relative who lives with depression in the summer, and thrives in the winter.
Have you thought about the words  use that keep mental health stigma alive and well? I recently got into a rather heated debate with a mental health writer about her choice of words. Specifically, I felt uneasy by her use of the phrase "these people." I'm not sure why this phrase triggered feelings of separateness in me; in the scheme of things, it is not the most offense phrase in the English lexicon. Then it clicked. Historically, words have been used to separate and disfranchise people with mental illnesses. Words have power, and the use of words carelessly promotes stigma and the viewpoint that "these people" are scary, dangerous, and to be avoided.
What is it that causes Schizophrenia? What is it that makes one see, hear and think the inconceivable? Freud believed that Schizophrenia was caused by repressed homosexuality, a theory with no solid evidence. Nevertheless the idea is still perpetuated amongst certain circles of psychoanalysts who are misguided by an outdated theory. Why is this?
Parenting a child with mental illness brings about some anxiety. The upcoming school year helps me reflect on Bob. Much more so when the retailers are preparing for school shopping time. I'm an anxious person so I imagine Bob has a hard time dealing with me. I worry about making sure that he has everything he needs for school - supplies, review of the rules and some patience. Reflecting on your special needs child before school starts can help ease your worries.
No one likes a disruption of his or her daily routine. But is it worth getting upset about? Becky Oberg, author of the More Than Borderline blog, discusses how to survive and thrive despite chaos.
Marketers today are obsessed with “branding” which, in the most general of terms, is the mental picture a prospect or customer has of a company. For example, when you say “McDonald’s” I think of a diabolical clown whose red shoes skate across a smear of grease. Others might think of inedible food in bright red boxes served up by awkward, angry teenagers dreaming of their next tattoos. Companies may project any brand they like, but their actual brand is the image and opinion others have of them.

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Paula
I have a lifetime of trauma and BPD and depression & anxiety and i can really identify with everything you have said chronic low self esteem and believing i nothing worthwhile to contribute to any conversations in social situations, iv grown up believing i was a bad evil person who doesn’t deserve anything good that life has to offer, even when im with my family i again feel like im an outsider and all the above caused me to isolate for 16 years and this made my situation a million times worse when i came back into society only months ago, im absolutely filled with Paranoia and i dont feel safe around humans unless im with 2 people that i can sort of connect with but its not often this happens and on any given day im that terrible or feel unable to have a conversation with people i can retreat to isolation again which again makes me worse everytime, i feel like i suffer if im out with people and i suffer if i isolate, im just constantly in a state of anxiety and terror and it paralyzes me and makes me brain shut down where i cant even think of a sentence to strike up a conversation with people, it’s absolutely horrendous and all the negative things my head tells me about myself it’s disturbing! I wouldn’t talk to anyone else the way i talk to myself but i just dont know how to stop it its been so ingrained in me for at least 4 decades now and im 45 years old.. i keep hoping one day it will get easier, but my heads such a mess, honestly and im not a bad person, iv just had a lifetime of trauma since i was a little girl that it completely changed me, that I don’t even recognise myself and neither does my family or anyone who knew me, but i might have more serious mental health iv just never been able to get out the house to go to mental health assessments.. but i wish you all luck!
Anonymous
Hi I'm 15 and I have severe anger issues that I can't control. I don't know why I am like this but when I am super mad I like to punch myself in the head repeatedly until I pass out and I sometimes slam my head against the wall. I used to cut but I try not to. I would just take scissors and you know, snip snip. I think this started when I was younger- around 12 years old. I always thought about sh but now I actually do it. I wish I had never started because once you start you can't go back. It's like a one-way road. There is no way you are going back to where you started.
anon
I do not have a BPD diagnosis (or think I should), but I can relate to much of what you're saying. I had a parent who was bipolar and struggled with addiction and who ultimately died when I was in my twenties. My other parent was extremely religious and I was raised in a controlling and punitive environment. I am extremely codependent on my intimate partners but can simultaneously hold others at a distance when I feel overstimulated or just want to be alone. I too am very triggered by perceived abandonment and really struggle to communicate with others because I feel too much too intensely and cannot make others understand it..I don't always understand it. Despite all of this, I feel very triggered by this post?? I have a friend who also struggles in the same ways I do, but I suspect it is much worse for them. I notice they ALWAYS have plans even when they feel burned out because they are terrified of being alone. We used to be very codependent on one another but now I find myself keeping my distance. And sometimes for unrelated reasons, I have to cancel plans. OR I will state upfront that I tentatively agree to the plans but reserve the right to cancel if I don't feel up to it. I don't know if that makes me a bad friend or not; I have been in counseling for years learning how to hold space for both myself and others. And sometimes that looks like cancelling or rescheduling. I know that this is a trigger for my friend- they not so casually mention other "flaky" friends in conversation- but at what point am I supposed to cater to someone else's (sometimes irrational) needs at the expense of my own peace? Why do I have to give you a play by play of my thought process (and maybe a doctor's note) to get out of doing something? What's an acceptable reason to cancel? This friend recently encourages me to just say I don't want to do something (almost aggressively mind you), but when I do, I feel like I get the silent treatment or otherwise passive aggressive responses. And I am constantly hearing stories about this person's disappointment in other friends who cancel or are perceived as flaky. I want to give them space to process their feelings about cancelled plans, but sometimes I feel annoyed and overlooked. Like their pain is more valid or important than my own. I have not had the courage to talk to my friend about this but feel I need to soon or else I will continue to harbor resentment. Anyway, I know there's room for all of us to feel our feelings but it's so hard to navigate right now. I have been a caretaker in one form or another my entire life. I really need to take care of myself and not feel guilty about it. The end!
Mj. Bean
You're definitely not alone. My boyfriend has DID and more often times than not, we dont get throiugh the day without arguing or disagreeing at least once. I'm head over heels in love with "Super Max" which is who he basically is when he reaches this sort of "peak performance" and the "lesser" maxs' are the ones that can get downright insane. One talks like an 8 year old, another one acts like he's around 20 years old. I didn't have any idea he had this until we were 3 months in and i had already fallen hard for him. Most days he's in "annoyed/angry max mode" where he is literally the biggest control freak on the planet. Obsesses over silly things like "spilling" things and such. It can be exhausting but the violent max is the one that, while i rarely see him, he's still the only one i dread and have only seen a handful of times.

My point being, I'm right there with you. I hate the rollercoaster. I just want to live life without being in a state of constant fight or flight mode, only for his character to change and de-escalate and I fall for the person I fell for all over again.
Exhausting is a horrible word. The understatement of all understatements, if you will.

I wish there were better support groups for this kind of mental health condition.
midnightvibes
I’m so sorry that you’re going through this. It sounds so difficult and I can’t imagine what it must feel like. I know what it’s like to feel like no one in the world cares, that they’re all just caught up in their lives, and I’m so sorry that you’re feeling that way. I would just say stay strong and seek the help you deserve. You deserve to be alive in this world. Even if it feels like you don’t, you 100% do. I don’t know you but I can tell from this post it’s seems like you are resilient and care about others and have some hopes for the future. Stay strong friend, seek help if you are able to, and have hope if you can. I believe in you so much <3