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I have a long history with perfectionism. In fact, I cannot recall a time in my life when this fixation wasn't driving my performance and achievements. I suspect this is one reason I have always been drawn to activities or pursuits that measure excellence in visible, quantifiable terms. In school, I only accepted straight As. In athletics, I gravitated to sports like archery, where I could aim for the center of a literal bullseye. And in my career, I have turned to writing—a skill based on technical precision. But as I continue to heal my thoughts and behaviors from the residue of anorexia, I am learning to appreciate that eating disorder recovery is not about perfection.
It can be discouraging for many individuals to move away from and begin verbal abuse recovery once they realize the journey is not straightforward. Unlike overcoming other life obstacles, recovery from verbal abuse may present setbacks, leaving an individual with lost hope for a healthy relationship. Although the process may not be as simple as avoiding an abuser, it is possible to hold meaningful connections with others.
In my experience, the worst part of schizophrenia is having episodes of psychosis. Losing touch with reality can be terrifying. For me, psychosis always involves hearing voices, delusions, and paranoia. I usually stop eating, which most likely makes the symptoms more severe. Complicating my experience with psychosis is a symptom called anosognosia.
As a writer, I’ve found creativity is one of the first things to be affected when my depression rears its ugly head. Depression makes it harder to motivate myself to write and harder to express my unique creative voice—the thing that brings me the most joy.
You may have heard some variation of the famous saying, "perspective is everything." While many people believe this is a good life philosophy, I disagree. Perspective is vital, but it is not everything.
As I tried to come up with a topic for this blog post, my mind spun a web of negative thoughts. I realized that the deadline for publication was looming. Like many weeks, I scolded myself for procrastinating. Then I started thinking about unrelated issues like my work performance, unmet goals, rejection, friendships, and relationships. Depression tortured me with lies that I will reveal in this post. Here are five of the lies my depression has told me and what I have learned from them.
I’ve never described it in these terms, but I hacked my skin-picking disorder. Excoriation disorder used to control every aspect of my life—physically and emotionally—and I was certain I’d suffer forever. Today, I can share with you that this is far from reality. I might have skin picking disorder, but it doesn’t have me.
For a very long time, I wasn’t comfortable with myself. During my journey to healing, I quickly realized that it’s a lot easier for us to make friends with strangers than our own selves. It took me such a long time to make friends with myself and slowly learn to love who I am. Now that I’m here, I hope to help as many people as possible find their way to self-love.
Recently, I have noticed a disturbing diet-talk trend whenever I am with a group of women. Last week, for example, someone at my job said they eat less than 1000 calories while dieting. Another is preparing for her upcoming wedding by eliminating all carbohydrates. Constantly, I hear things like, "I'm trying to be good, so I'm not eating sugar," or "I was so bad last night because I ate ice cream."
In a perfect world, it would be nice to avoid adversity altogether, but unfortunately, everybody has to face unfavorable circumstances at some point. However, dwelling on adversity only leads to dismay, and focusing on the potential positive outcomes in any situation is much more likely to work in your favor.

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It does not matter
I can not do anything for days at a time. Sleep is only relief and I can not sleep enough. Body hurts and have to get out of bed. I suffer from depression, anxiety, apathy, ptsd and ocd. There is no point in anything as I will not take meds, will not go to behavior mod and will only do talk therapy if I do not have to go in person or show my face. Doomed to live miserably
Someonewhocares
My own step daughter is going through this, even to this day. Her Italian father is old fashioned, outdated, old school, he uses her as a punching bag for his many miserable and repetitive failures, his own lack of confidence in himself, he's a coward and a worm, a total loser, it really truly breaks my heart. I've tried many times to talk to her face to face but she runs, she only listens to her mother who she's very close to. I tried to toughen her up and strengthen her weak, very timid and naively trusting character, but she does have many other strong qualities. She does give her piece of mind to some people who deserve it. Last night was the breaking point, she's had enough. She texted her father and told him he's a total miserable loser and to leave her alone for good.
So many times I've told her, stay far away from him, he will tear into you and shit all over you if you dare to go with him anywhere. Sure enough, every time he's alone with her in his car, when they go out as a family with her tow small children he craps on her and abuses her emotionally and mentally.
She always says she knows what to do...but they're just meaningless words. Sad...
JoAnna Johnson
When it comes to anticipating the upcoming activity, especially if I'm in hyperfocus mode and need to shift, I often think about what it is I am about to do (like going home to be with kids from work) I'll think about things that make me feel motivated that I want to do when I get home. My brain shifts to where it is that I'm going and starts pulling all of the tasks/things I enjoy completing to the for front. Then I transition much easier.
Annonomous
Myself and partner both had an embarrassing night. My partner got blind drunk and passed out. I checked on him and he seemed okay. Then I look again at him and he has pulled his penis out in front of everyone and starts peeing while sitting on the couch. I am shocked embarrassed surprised and react like a crazy person. I scream and yell at him for doing that. Today I hate myself for reacting that way in front of all his friends. I’m embarrassed for him and myself.
Surina
I am so sorry sweetheart. It is now your job, responsibility, and duty to get yourself away from him regardless the cost. Go to a shelter out of state if need be. Take photos and create a log and file a restraining order now! Pretend you love yourself more than life, pretend you are your own daughter, son, friend, mom or anyone who you would protect. You MUST love yourself more than the apathy from this situation. My heart bleeds for you. I do understand. Please protect yourself now. He will not stop and this will only get worse until you are in the grave - or worse than that! I’m sending you love from afar and I pray you find the strength to run away. Don’t fight fire with fire, fight back with the hope of your future self. You are worth fighting for! Fight back with the rain and the sand by extinguishing his hate by leaving. You CAN do this! I believe in you. You are not alone. Good luck 🍀 and god speed!